When I first came to the US as an exchange student at sixteen, I was amazed that no one seemed to lock their doors. I stayed with families in a tiny town, and their homes were always open, just like their cars. But while driving through Toledo, Ohio, we would lock the car doors from the inside. And friends who lived close to an interstate in the country bolted their doors at night.
In Germany, everyone locks their houses – all – the – time, just like their cars. Even when they are home. It’s a habit. If you are not sure, you go back to check. Starting with first grade, I was a Schlüsselkind, a child wearing a key around the neck or somewhere else, so I wouldn’t lose it, because I walked home by myself after school while my parents were still at work.
Today, I live in upstate New York, and we have neighbors who never lock their house, even when they go on vacation, and we have neighbors with a Secured by ADT sign next to their driveway.
I never understood why people wouldn’t lock their residences. The simple thought of someone unwanted, touching, destroying, or taking our possessions would terrify me. It would mean a violation of my privacy and total loss of control.
I will never forget my mom’s terrifying reaction when she thought that she accidentally donated all her precious jewelry to the Red Cross. She was crying, and stomping in panic, completely terrified, and full of self-hate in a catastrophic state of mind. Watching her scared me to the bones.
A few years later they had their house broken into, but her possessions were hidden too well for the intruders. Still, over twenty years later, they bolt their doors at night.
I once asked our neighbors with the unlocked doors, why they don’t bother, and they answered: „And what would they take? All of our old stuff?“
After decluttering, especially my jewelry, I understand her completely. Of course, we have irreplaceable possessions. But they are of sentimental value, none of it would be valuable in a stranger’s eye. We are also strong believers in banks and don’t keep our savings under the mattress. Important documents and pictures are in the cloud. Yet, I still lock our doors and am relieved to have an unfriendly – that’s an understatement – dog. I believe I might do this because I watched too many terrifying movies growing up. It’s the people and our privacy I worry about, not objects. I refuse to have objects give me TLC.